I went to my first La Leche League meeting yesterday. It was smaller than I expected, but it was good. We met outside at a park and I definately got a good burn.
In the last week I've had two different dreams about nursing. The first dream went something like this: I went into labour, had my baby within a couple of hours and then was trying to nurse. It was a pretty realistic dream, other than the labour being virtually painless and being fast - oh and I think I decided to have my baby. The nursing part was so realistic I could feel everything and was convinced it was actually happening. Most of my dream was just about sitting there nursing. When I woke up I had a little panic because I was confused, where was my baby? And then I realised I was still pregnant.
Last night or maybe early this morning, I had a dream about trying to nurse my niece. She is three now but in my dream I think she was one and a half or two. My sister said it would be good practice, but I was having trouble getting her latched on. Infact, it hurt. She seemed to be getting impatient and there wasn't much milk coming out. Then my sister came over and said I was doing it wrong. She repositioned me and it was much more comfortable and I had lots of milk. I remember wanting to practice before the baby came.
Weird. I don't really have anxieties about breastfeeding but my dreams would say the contrary. I am nervous it will hurt, that I won't be able to get my baby to latch properly (and that's why it will hurt) and that I won't have enough milk supply. I know the solution to all of these things!
The next thing I am going to be dreaming about is trying to nurse in a baby carrier or wrap and having my baby fall out or something absurd. Either that or being told off for publicly breastfeeding.
Showing posts with label pregnancy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pregnancy. Show all posts
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Friday, July 2, 2010
The Beginning
As this is the beginning of the blog I decided it would only be appropriate to make the first entry about how this journey started.
In the first week of May my husband and I had been living in Alberta for a month. We had just moved into our first Alberta apartment, a basement with adequate light and fairly new construction. I was working as an interior design assistant with a company called Hot Mama Design, and we had joked about how it would only be appropriate if I was pregnant (my boss has two children). It was then that I began to feel...differently. My nose became hypersensitive, I could smell things I never knew I would be able to smell. Like the smell of smoke from two years ago when there were junkies living in our apartment. Or the smell of sausage my husband so graciously cooked for dinner, before I had even entered the front door (to his dismay I thought it was disgusting). I found foods I had once loved to be revolting. My size 2 jeans wouldn't zip up...infact none of my jeans felt comfortable zipped up. I was as bloated as a whale. I felt hot randomly, one moment I would be fine and the next I would be sweltering! This was particularily out of character as I am always freezing. I also would randomly feel pains similar to cramps, but somehow different. It hadn't really occured to me until Hot Mama (my boss) joked that I was pregnant. She lovingly pressured me into taking a test, and so I bought a double pack pregnancy test.
I waited a couple of days, and took one around the 6th of May. Negative. My symptoms kept on, and by May 10th I couldn't wait any longer. I paced impatiently for a minute, determined not to look at it until I had waited for the correct amount of time. I tried to think about what we would do if we were pregnant. And then I caved. I ran back to the bathroom, flipped the test upside and stared. The horizontal line came up clear and dark, I remember feeling a mix of releif and disappointment. With a million thoughts running through my mind I stood there staring at the test and to my amazement a faint red line appeared vertically. I blinked, said "What?!" gave a little shriek and ran down the hall and back up it again.
Within minutes I flew down to Hot Mama's house, showed her the test and asked a million questions about the accuracy and what that strange little line meant. She assured me that if it had showed up there was no way it would be wrong. There was nothing left to do but wait until the 15th to see if a period came or not.
Well, it didn't come. And that was that, Eric and I were going to have a baby just after our one year anniversary.
And that was how this all began.
In the first week of May my husband and I had been living in Alberta for a month. We had just moved into our first Alberta apartment, a basement with adequate light and fairly new construction. I was working as an interior design assistant with a company called Hot Mama Design, and we had joked about how it would only be appropriate if I was pregnant (my boss has two children). It was then that I began to feel...differently. My nose became hypersensitive, I could smell things I never knew I would be able to smell. Like the smell of smoke from two years ago when there were junkies living in our apartment. Or the smell of sausage my husband so graciously cooked for dinner, before I had even entered the front door (to his dismay I thought it was disgusting). I found foods I had once loved to be revolting. My size 2 jeans wouldn't zip up...infact none of my jeans felt comfortable zipped up. I was as bloated as a whale. I felt hot randomly, one moment I would be fine and the next I would be sweltering! This was particularily out of character as I am always freezing. I also would randomly feel pains similar to cramps, but somehow different. It hadn't really occured to me until Hot Mama (my boss) joked that I was pregnant. She lovingly pressured me into taking a test, and so I bought a double pack pregnancy test.
I waited a couple of days, and took one around the 6th of May. Negative. My symptoms kept on, and by May 10th I couldn't wait any longer. I paced impatiently for a minute, determined not to look at it until I had waited for the correct amount of time. I tried to think about what we would do if we were pregnant. And then I caved. I ran back to the bathroom, flipped the test upside and stared. The horizontal line came up clear and dark, I remember feeling a mix of releif and disappointment. With a million thoughts running through my mind I stood there staring at the test and to my amazement a faint red line appeared vertically. I blinked, said "What?!" gave a little shriek and ran down the hall and back up it again.
Within minutes I flew down to Hot Mama's house, showed her the test and asked a million questions about the accuracy and what that strange little line meant. She assured me that if it had showed up there was no way it would be wrong. There was nothing left to do but wait until the 15th to see if a period came or not.
Well, it didn't come. And that was that, Eric and I were going to have a baby just after our one year anniversary.
And that was how this all began.
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